Five kinds of help, in one house
Most people use more than one, and almost nobody starts with everything. What follows is what each actually involves.
Personal care
Help with washing, dressing and the parts of the day that have become hard.
Getting up, washing, dressing, help to the bathroom, and support with medication that has already been prescribed. Some people need this once a day, some need it four times.
This is the work people find hardest to accept, so we go slowly. It is usually easier if the first few visits are about something else and the personal care is added once the carer is a familiar face rather than a stranger.
Washing, bathing and dressing
Help to and from the bathroom
Reminders and support with prescribed medication
Help getting up and settling at night
Companionship
Someone in the house who is there for the person, not the task.
A conversation, a walk, a hand with the shopping, or simply someone in the room. Families sometimes feel this is not real care. In our experience it changes more weeks than anything else on this page.
It is also the easiest kind of help for someone to accept, which makes it a sensible way to start when the person is not sure they want anyone at all.
Conversation and company
Walks and trips out
Help with shopping and errands
A hand with letters, phone calls and appointments
Dementia support
The same faces, on the same pattern, for as long as we can manage it.
For most people living with dementia the routine is the care. A different carer each visit undoes a good deal of the benefit, so continuity is where we put the effort.
We work to what the person can still do rather than what they cannot, and we take direction from the family on what settles them and what does not. If there is a particular chair, a particular order, or a particular way of being asked, tell us and it becomes part of the plan.
A small, consistent group of carers
Routines kept as they are
Support with orientation and prompting
Guidance shared with the family as things change
Respite
Cover so a family carer can stop for a while.
An afternoon, a night, a week. Family carers tend to ask for this far later than they should, usually when they are already exhausted, and often while apologising for asking at all.
It is worth arranging before you need it. A carer the person already knows is much easier to hand over to than one who arrives for the first time on the day you leave.
Planned breaks, from an afternoon to a fortnight
Cover at short notice where we can
Overnight support
A handover written down so nothing is missed
After hospital
Extra support in the weeks when going back in is most likely.
The first fortnight after a discharge is when most people struggle. There is new medication, less confidence, and a house that was managed fine a month ago and now is not.
We put more hours in at the start and take them away as things settle, rather than agreeing a level and leaving it there.
More support at first, reducing as confidence returns
Help with new routines and prescribed medication
Meals and household tasks while recovering
An eye on whether things are improving or not
Not sure which of these you need
That is the normal position to be in, and it is what the first visit is for. We will tell you if we think you need less than you asked for.